New addition to the extended feline tribe . . .

Hey, Linus and Mabel! You got a new cousin!

I am happy to introduce you to my kid sister Beth’s new kitten, Miss Admiral Calypso. How excited are you?!

You jerks.

Who knows if it will stick, but I love the name. It’s progressive (since Alene B. Duerk became a rear admiral in the Navy Nurse Corps in 1972, only a slow trickle of women have moved their way up the ranks . . . though knowing a little about Beth’s partner, Will, I have a suspicion it is more a reference to Star Wars than the U.S. military) AND ironic (Calypso was not only a sea nymph—and we all know how much cats ordinarily love water—according to popular mythology, she was also a bit of a . . . lustful, we’ll go with lustful . . . and young Addie Callie [Addy-Cal?] has been properly neutered).

Regardless: good job! There is no greater birthday gift than seeing loved ones happy. Truly.

Quote of the day:

“What will we say when our kids come to us
and ask with a smile on their face,
‘Hey dad, my friends got some new ninja swords:
is it cool if we smash up this place?’”

—”Everybody Get Dangerous” Weezer

Farewell Boleros

Yesterday I took Rachel to Boleros, the second to last performance of the run. As I write this, our beautiful cast has returned from the theater to begin packing their bags if they haven’t already packed them, and soon our temporary extended family will depart. How much the show grew since opening night: it became tighter, funnier, sexier. More confident. More beautiful. It is amazing to see a great show grow even stronger as the actors refine their performances. Is this a form of evolution? Do their choices on stage go through a kind of survival of the fittest that is dependent on audience reaction? Or are their performances gradually shaped by their own personal journeys towards Truth: oh, that felt more honest tonight; oh, this gesture opened up a whole new way of looking at how I am feeling about this moment; oh, when she yells at me like that a person would really be thinking this, not that. And through this process, these investigators of humanity begin to piece it all together.

We have signed the lease on a new apartment in Berkeley. It is a four-apartment building from the ’20s owned by the grand nephew of the man who originally built it, and it is big and bright and beautiful and ours! We start moving out on Friday, but, of course, the packing has already begun, and that question of “What to bring?” forces one to ask “Who am I?” and “What is important to me now?” It looks as though the futon I bought in college–though still remarkably comfortable–will be replaced by a couch. The furniture Rachel brought from St. Louis to Chicago and Chicago to San Francisco will not be making the shorter trip across the Bay. And I look at my collection of t-shirts and wonder if it is not time to say farewell to that time of my life as well. How long can a man of 27 pull of a shirt with a raygun on it?

We don’t have the luxury (or the burden) of reliving the same scenes over and over again like the actors onstage. Our gradual evolution is more complicated by the lack of such predominant constants. But it is still inspiring to see our actors begin to piece it all together. It gives me hope that one day I might come close as well.

In the meantime, our cats are pleased as punch their three feline roommates have already moved out and they are free to run around without fear of confrontation. And they don’t even know that their new apartment has its own very own stairwell (i.e. cat playground) and window seat i.e. cat beach. Are they in for a treat!

Linus and Mabel Vs. The Paperbag Demon; or, How We Woke Up

The sad basement bedroom and bathroom of Fun-One-Who-Chases and Nice-One-Who-Cuddles (Which they only have to live in for one more month; Hooray!)

Mabel: It’s late.

Linus: So.

Mabel: And Fun-One-Who-Chases and Nice-One-Who-Cuddles are still on the big cat bed.

Linus: Yep.

Mabel: And you aren’t going insane.

Linus: What’re you trying to say?

Mabel: Well ordinarily, you would be bouncing off the walls trying to wake them up so that Fun-One-Who-Chases will play with you.

Linus: Well, they had a hard week.

Mabel: That’s really nice of you. What’s that about?

Linus: It’s this new thing I’m trying.

Mabel: Hey what’s that thing over there? That’s new.

Linus: It’s a brown paper thing that Fun-One-Who-Chases brought home yesterday.

Mabel: It looks neat. Hey it IS neat. It makes crackling noises when you sit on it. Oh and HEY check this out: I can crawl partly in it and push it around. Look at me! I’m a moving bag.

Linus: That’s stupid . . . let me try.

Mabel: Fuck off.

Linus: I’m a boy and you eat all my food, Fatty.

Mabel: Dammit. Fine.

Linus: Hey! This IS fun.

Mabel: I know right.

Linus: Hey look at these handle things!

Mabel: I wouldn’t mess with those.

Linus: No no it’s cool, they look just big enough to stick my head through. Wait.

Mabel: What?

Linus: Oh my god it won’t let go.

Mabel: Won’t let go! What are you talking about!?

Linus: It was a trick. The bag is alive and IT IS EATING MY FACE!

Mabel: Oh my god!

Linus: OH MY GOD! HELP ME HELP ME!

Mabel: Stop chasing me you freak! I can’t do anything but look cute at it!

Linus: It won’t let go! It’s sucking out my brains!

Mabel: You just pissed yourself!

Linus: I just pissed myself! I can’t control my bodily functions!

Mabel: The bag demon is taking over your brain! Okay, Mable: puff-up-mode GO! Look at me! I’m huge! You fear me!

Linus: GET OFF ME YOU BASTARD. (Smash into the toilet!) Take that! (Smash into the cabinets!) Oh my god! (Smash into everything else in the room!) It’s INVINCIBLE. I’M GOING TO DIE!

Mabel: I’M GOING TO DIE!

Linus: The only way to stop it is to reach 88 mph and time travel to the moment before I stuck my face in this paper s.o.b.’s trap!

Mabel: Just stay out of the bathroom! You’re already dead! Think about your sister! I’ll carry on the story of your heroism, just keep the F away from me!

Linus: Why’s Fun-One-Who-Chases trying to catch me!

Mabel: He’s just trying to end your misery more quickly.

Linus: Does he understand NOTHING about time travel!

Mabel: You’re going to die just go with it!

Linus: He’s cornered me!

Mabel: Thank god! I’m safe!

Linus: He’s helping the bag monster strangle me!

Mabel: It’s okay. You were a good brother. I mean, you were kind of an asshole, but you’re a boy, so it’s understandable.

Linus: Wait. I think Fun-One-Who-Chases is attacking the bag monster!

Mabel: He’s not murdering you?

Linus: He’s not murdering me! He’s pulled it off me! I’m free from it’s fangs!

Mabel: Tell him to take that paper mutha-f-er out back and set that bastard on fire.

Linus: I guess he’s more useful than I thought.